Element Education
Book Club

*Guiding questions for this week’s (February 8th) reading are:

* Which false assumption from the introduction stands out for you the most? Why do you think that is? 

*Pg 11 describes a conventional school experience.  In what way(s) does your child(ren)’s learning environment differ?

*While we can’t control all our children’s stresses, what are some ways you might identify and eliminate your child(ren)’s toxic stress, perhaps reducing it to tolerable stress?  In what ways might you expose them to more positive stress?

*Did you try any of the “What to Do Tonight” suggestions?  How did it go?

• What tends to be your go-to phrases when you are trying to get your child(ren) to do to schoolwork? How much of your child’s learning is consensual and how much is forced?

• In what ways have you missed opportunities to give your child “a small experience of control? In what ways have you provided the opportunity? (pg 37)

• Element schools are personalized learning programs in which parents play an active role in their child(ren)’s learning. In what ways are you and your EF on the same page as far as how much “support” to give your child(ren)?

• In what ways do you set up your home as an empowering place to live and learn?

Additional Resources:

check out the podcast episode titled "Standing By the Water: Owning What You See."

• What are ways you have worked with your child(ren) to identify possible solutions together? In what ways were they responsible for the consequences?

• When was a time that you and your child(ren)’s perspective clashed? Were you able to share your thoughts and come to a compromise? If no, how could things have gone better? If yes, what seemed to be the magic?

• In what ways do you enjoy your child(ren)? What is it that brings mutual joy to your relationship(s)?

• Share a strategy you tried at the end of Ch 3 or 4

Lois Ingber will join us to discuss the Routine Chart.

On page 117, the authors point out that "what motivates one child will not necessarily motivate another." Review the results of your child(ren)'s Power Traits assessment. (If you are unfamiliar with the assessment, or forget how to access the results, contact your EF. Terri can help you with this as well). Review the results with your child to get their perspective on accuracy. Have the discussion with the goal of understanding what motivates your child(ren) and how you can integrate interests into their daily routine.

Next week we have the pleasure of author, Dr. William Stixrud attending our meeting. This is a wonderful opportunity for free advice and insight from a professional.

What activity(ies) refresh your brain? What activity(ies) refresh your child(ren)’s brains? How do/can you navigate the similarities and differences between what works for you and your child(ren)?

Revisit the Power Traits results we referred to last week and ask your child(ren) which of the areas of interest they would like to spend more time on. Ask them for their opinion on how to make that happen. Bring challenging requests to the group for some more ideas.

The authors recommend 9 – 11 hours of sleep for 6–13-year-olds, and 8-10 hours for ages 14-17. How does your child(ren)’s sleep schedule compare?

If your child comes up short on sleep time, what seem to be the challenges (i.e. schedule, caffeine or sugar consumption, lack of outdoor exercise, evening device time, noise)?

Which of the suggested strategies on pages 165 and 166 and/or 169 to 171 did you try? What were the results?

Check out these episodes of our podcast. We had the privilege last Fall of speaking with Dr. John Ratey, author of Spark: The Revolutionary New Science of Exercise and the Brain and Go Wild: Free Your Body and Mind from Afflictions of Civilization.

Both books and his interview, address the topic of sleep.

https://www.elementiseverything.org/spark-and-go-wild/

https://www.elementiseverything.org/spark-and-go-wild-part-2/

What sparked your interest in an alternative education model for your child/children?

In what ways did your decision regarding an alternative model meet, or not meet, your expectations?

In what ways do you, or could you, emphasize and support the notion that your child/children are responsible for their own education, rather than depending on the adults in their lives?

What does high challenge and low threat look like for you? How is that the same/different than your child/children?

What would/does your child enjoy outside of technology? Does your family have designated tech free times and/or zones? What new activities have you

introduced as an alternative to technology?

• What mental strategies have you worked on, or would you like to work on, with your child(ren)?

o Planning ahead

o Visualizing goals

o Navigating negative thoughts

o Plan B thinking.

• In what ways do you/ can you work to build those skills?

• What is something your child does really well that you can use to balance what does not come easily to him?

• What percentage of time do your children engage in outdoor play compared to instructional time?

• With the best of intentions, we sometimes offer external motivators to encourage our children to do something we want them to do. Has there been a time that has been unsuccessful for you? In hindsight, how do you feel the situation could have gone better?

• Low levels of dopamine lead to low levels of motivation. The authors discuss some ways to increase dopamine. Here is an article which includes more information.

• What daily habits have shown to help your child(ren)’s level of engagement and motivation?

Preparing For Life After High School

What vision do we have for our children and how is that playing out in their daily lives? Do they share our vision of what we want for them as an adult, or do they want to be/do something different? In what ways do our words, behaviors, and family culture support our children to be what we want vs what they want? In what ways may our thoughts or behaviors come from a place of fear?